Tokio Hotel WW131 (Jealous person's review)

Reviewed by: John-Michael Bond [Tue, May 20, 2008 @ 12:59:18 AM]
Due to a large amount of fan response to this review. White boy dreads. Massive hair sprayed hair. Jnco style jeans. Crappy 80’s hair metal with emo choruses. Much like Germany’s decision to invade Russia during the second world war, this export is a mistake in every way. If you like this band you make music worse, and should probably consider stabbing yourself in the ears with a screwdriver.

1 out of 10
RIYL: The worst of the worst in music. I have decided to directly address the complaints of the fans as well as further explaining why I dislike this band, using one of the many pieces of angry mail I received as a reference point. Let’s begin.

Hello, John.
I read your review of Tokio Hotel's English album on MammothPress. You are mistaken. It's not your fault - you made the mistake many critics make, out of lack of time to do proper research. But really - listening to the first English record, a translation, of a German band that sounds best live - not a good way to get a feel for their musical caliber.

You are totally right. It would be wrong for a reviewer to not check out a band’s past before they write a review. However this wasn’t the case with Tokio Hotel I’ve heard some of the band’s German language material and felt the same about it as I do this American release. I also listened to Scream a remarkable three times before I wrote my review. Repeated listening only brought out the weaknesses of the music.

To really understand the power of this band, check out the live DVD from their Zimmer 483 tour in Europe.
Then you will understand how good they really are in their element - rocking a sold-out arena, in Europe, singing in their native language.

When I watch these guys sing in their native language I have no choice but to pay attention to the music, and I still feel the same way. These guys are able to play their instruments well. Big deal, so could the members of Limp Bizkit and they were still awful. Musically these songs, noted as the band’s best, sound like Hannah Montana covers with a nu-metal backing band and a dude singing.

This is something you just can't begin to get off of some recording, much less one that's not in their native tongue.

Their live show is the same live show as a million other big bands from Paramore to Jay Z, lots of lights and sing-a-longs. A thousand fans screaming doesn’t mean something is great. Again remember that Limp Bizkit used to sell out arenas. Also if a band from another country releases a version of their album in a language other than their own it is totally fair to judge them on that product. After all they are asking fans in the new country to buy this product, and since this band isn’t some DIY German underground act but a million plus selling act with lots of money behind this release they should be held to a higher standard. If this is the best they could do, they have no excuses.

Give them another chance!

And don't judge them on their looks, please. Your review was so acid, it sounded bitter - lots of guys don't understand why other guys would want to look the way the Tokio Hotel guys do, or why girls like it, so they turn into rabid haters. Don't do that. They can look how they want, and music listeners can decide for themselves how they feel about the guys' look. And how can the guys be posers, when they've styled themselves this way since the beginning of time? The twins have been pierced, tattooed, dyed and dreadlocked since the days they were 9, 11 and whatnot. The studios didn't "make" them look this way - they're authentic, it's just how they like to look.


If the fans can judge the band on their looks (see the million Myspace comments on their different international street team pages talking about which member is the cutest), I feel like it is fair for a review to do it. They dress the way they do because it
is their image. As the band’s career has grown their look has gotten bigger as well, because it looks better when you’re playing on a massive stage. Also I don’t know the tattooing laws in Germany, but I’m pretty sure they don’t allow 9 or 11 year olds to get tattooed.
Image is an important part of this band; they’ve got
the tough one, the cute one, the edgy kind of androgynous one and the normal looking guy. It’s the exact same formula used by boy bands in the 90’s, and
it’s worth addressing. I’ve included a picture for a better example.

Anyway I think you had some kind of gut/knee-jerk reaction against some element in Tokio Hotel, and missed a lot of the enormous gifts, talent, charisma, and likeability that this band has to offer.
Reconsider?
I have, and sadly my second look has left with the exact same feelings I had before. Tokio Hotel is Poison with emo choruses, nothing more and nothing less. It’s fine that they’re popular, but it doesn’t make them good. Remember Nick Drake died almost unknown and there are thousands of bands slugging it out in basements
across the world who will never make it to arenas who write songs Tokio Hotel never could. Maybe if they had a multi-million dollar marketing budget they too could be your favorite band. But chances are until they’re on the radio or MTV they won’t.

Thanks for reading,
Kay

Thanks for writing.
John